The arrival of a new family member means a big change not only for parents but also for siblings. Parents often grapple with the question of how to best prepare their child so that welcoming the new baby goes smoothly and without major distress. It’s important to understand your child and prepare them in time for the changes ahead.
Timing it right and telling your child
Parents often ask themselves when is the best time to tell a child that a baby is on the way. We recommend waiting until the pregnancy is certain. The risk of complications is lower, usually around the end of the first trimester.
Be prepared for a range of reactions—excitement, indifference, jealousy. All of them are natural; give your child space to share their emotions. We recommend pairing the pregnancy announcement with a positive experience—for example, looking at baby photos together or books about siblings. Allow your child to ask questions and explain in simple terms the changes that are coming.
If your child reacts negatively or is afraid, stay calm and don’t pressure them to be happy. Give them time.
Emotional preparation and managing your child’s emotions
The most common emotion children experience—and the one that worries parents most—is jealousy. This is completely normal, because the child may see the new arrival as competition for parents’ love and attention. It’s important to understand and accept your child’s feelings.
Make it clear to your child that your love for them won’t change and that there’s enough love in the family for everyone. Explain that the baby needs more care because they can’t walk or talk yet and need help.
Teach your child to recognize emotions; talk openly about their feelings and fears. Use simple emotion labels (“I see you’re sad,” “I understand this bothers you”). It helps to give them space to express emotions—through drawing, play, or talking.
Practical preparation for your child before the baby arrives
To reduce your child’s stress, involve them actively in the practical preparations. You can choose some items together, such as toys. Doing things together helps the child understand what’s happening and feel included in the new situation.
There are great books and games about welcoming a sibling—reading such stories can help your child understand the changes to come. Role-play caring for a baby; buy your child a doll or plush toy to practice caregiving and feel like a “big brother” or “big sister”.
How to handle changes after the sibling is born
A sibling’s arrival brings big changes—new demands on parents and the older child alike. Regardless of fatigue and busyness, make time just for the older child, even brief moments during the day. Individual attention for the older child helps reduce jealousy and supports positive sibling relationships.
After the baby is born, changes in the older child’s behavior may appear—regression, defiance, or irritability. Stay patient. The child needs to know they are still loved and still matter to you.
A newborn requires a lot of care and time, and the older child may feel pushed aside. Try to include the older sibling in baby-related tasks—bringing diapers, helping with bathing, or simply being nearby.
Common parental mistakes and how to avoid them
A common mistake is assuming that a child will automatically welcome a new sibling with enthusiasm. In reality, a child’s emotions can be complicated. Don’t punish a child for negative emotional expressions toward the baby—understanding is the better choice.
Don’t compare your children to each other (“Your little brother never misbehaves like you”). Such behavior fuels rivalry.
Don’t make false promises (“You’ll always play together”). That can lead to unnecessary disappointment.
Frequently asked questions:
- What if the child reacts negatively or aggressively toward the baby?
- Above all, be patient, listen to the child, try to understand their emotions, and give them space.
- How do we address an outright rejection of the sibling?
- Don’t force positive emotions; slowly and gently rebuild bonds through cuddling and shared play.
- Can poor preparation for a sibling’s arrival have long-term consequences?
- It can; it may disrupt sibling relationships, so don’t underestimate this preparation.
You can absolutely handle preparing for a sibling with your older child! Above all, be patient and keep a positive perspective.